Sometimes we are deceived by our
own illusions and believe that our hopeless romantic ideals will pull
through. Sometimes we forget to
understand the value of our own worth and give in to mirages that hold no
promises. Sometimes we rely on another
to feel a sense of affection that is so lost in translation – quite often this
is the wake up of all stresses that keeps one awake at nights.
Why do we forget our worth? Why do we not see the clarity of the
problem? Externally speaking, this is
not such a complicated equation; one needs only to solve it by taking a step
back and realizing that those who would not bother to be attentive to emotions
are the ones who deserve you the least. Internally
speaking, it is easier said than done. Is
it due to infatuations of the heart? Is
it attachment to the idea of something inexistent?
We get hurt by someone who
refuses to acknowledge our efforts, simply because we laid all our cards on the
table, not realizing that all along, the game was being played by a single
person. Sometimes we refuse to see that
we’re being foolish for allowing our vulnerability to be revealed to the hands
of someone we barely know – because we thought we knew this person, and in the
end, their true colours display a different shade of grey.
It is possible that these people
never intended to hurt us. It is
probable that they never intended to stick around for a very long time. They may have seen you as an option or a
source of distraction while they sorted out their priorities. It was you who saw beyond the present moment
and took it to the extreme of hopeful measures.
In a way, losing your
self-respect is what led you to feel undesired.
Disregarding your self-worth is what let you fall into the abyss of
unwantedness, not your partner’s lack of affection. You expected a change that would benefit you.
If truly you are the type of
person who requires emotional attention, think first about your worth and what
you feel you deserve, and then ask yourself:
Does this person have what it
takes to make me feel satisfied? If
you are seeking for the chemistry that is provided to you through mind, body,
and soul, then you must first inquire within if any of these are missing in the
person that you’re seeing. Then you must
ask yourself with honesty whether this will be fulfilled by this person’s own
will or if you’re being hopeful that it will change… (This is often a tricky
task to do because infatuation seems to speak louder than logic at times and we
are blinded and tricked into making the wrong decision – until someone gets
hurt).
Does this person treat you the way you deserve?
If you’re not in this person’s
future plans – if you feel like you are competing for attention because this
person has other priorities - then this is not “the one” for you, regardless of
how much you want it to be. The hardest
step (the first step) is letting go…
De acuerdo completamente con su escrito... KNOW YOUR WORTH. Not everyone is built the same way in regards to how they see love, show love... this can be a most frustrating thing to deal with in many relationships. Some people are simply more emotional than others and actually need that kind of display of love. I've always been a believer in love through people's actions. But something that has always been a great mystery to me is the way that people "show" love - because everyone does it in their own way. Not everyone is emotionally equal in this way, not everyone needs it in that way... so where is that line, the one that tells you that something is simply not enough?
ReplyDeleteI think the answer has to do with backbending, I really do. In order for any relationship to survive, backbending has to occur. At times we fear we will break our backs, and of course, there has to be a sense of equilibrium between los dos... nos encontramos en la mitad, siempre... but at times one of us gets lazy and that's when we suffer... entonces nos peleamos, because someone gets lazy and forgets to do their part.
I've toyed with this question many times; the idea of being with someone who is your emotional equal. At times I think yes, we should all be with someone who shows love in the same way, that it would make our lives easier but perhaps also boring? I suppose another way of looking at it is that sometimes you actually require that balance, that sense of working harder, together, for the greater good of los dos and those very differences somehow can make you both stronger, allowing you both to experience greater growth and maturity.
When we both bend over backwards, yes, there is this sense of discomfort at first, that hopefully with time turns into a sense of accomplishment. Of course you are reaching towards each other the entire time, trying to create a sense of unity, oneship made of two striving to reach each other as best as they can.
Let's hope no one breaks their back! Ojala que no! I speak frankly and earnestly.
Gracias por su escrito otra vez. Como un espejo en mi cara. Me encanta mucho. Siempre, tengo muchas preguntas sin respuestas.
Q :)